Black Bear

September 19, 2010 | 4:06 pm | Great Smoky Mountains National Park - Tennessee

False Witness

I dropped my car off at the shop for some routine maintenance today. While I was settling my bill, the cashier asked if I or my wife had Facebook accounts. I didn't feel like explaining why I didn't want to "friend" or "become a fan" the service station, so I just lied and said no. I used to use this same tactic when a cashier asked if I had an e-mail address, but I've stopped since no one under the age of 75 can believably claim to not have an e-mail address anymore. I don't even know why I feel the need to lie in order to avoid having to politely refuse an offer to receive targeted marketing. I absolutely love declining to share my phone number when asked by a cashier - it makes me feel like I've just vetoed a bill in the UN Security Council.